Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Halfway House Cafe


Hope:    And so the adventures continue…
I woke up this morning feeling like I was hit by a freight train. I live on a pretty large piece of land with avocado, orange, and pomegranate trees, gardens, 11 pets, and well, an abundance of other trees, plants, etc. I declared yesterday to be tree cutting day, so armed with my chainsaw and an ego the size of Arizona, I made my way into the backyard to get rid of some trees that had grown into (what appeared to be) power lines. Of course, not wanting to be a complete idiot and cut down something that would cause me (or anyone else) serious problems, I called my local SCE office and a representative pointed out the fact that the two wires I was describing were for cable and telephone service, none of which I currently have (or want).  I learned these are cables, not live wires and although they were thoroughly embedded in my trees, Time Warner or the local telephone company would not trim the trees to protect their cable.              
So, taking matters into my own hands (this could be potentially dangerous for everyone), I decided to rid my backyard of these eyesores. Anyone who has ever been within close proximity of me when I decide to take on a project such as this pretty much anticipates it being one of those situations that will have you laughing so hard you’ll wet yourself. And well, this was no different.
I really like the fact that I am pretty self-sufficient and have lots of tools to do whatever needs doing around my house and yard. But by this time, I was utterly sweaty and exhausted, I decided to call it a day…and the only thing on my list was a nice hot shower! I took it easy the rest of the afternoon and called it a day around , celebrating with 3 Advil.
Fast forward to this morning, at 6:00 a.m., when I realized that every inch of my body hurt. A LOT. And so, the texting began around and we decided on the restaurant to visit today. Of course, I had suggested this place in the past, but he wanted no part of it. Go figure. We agreed to have him be at my house at and I specifically told him NOT to show up early. Of course, he reminded me that that probably wouldn’t be much of a problem for someone who is perpetually late. Oh yea, huh??  It’s a really good thing I was hungry, because truth be told, I would have been just as happy sitting in a nice HOT Jacuzzi for the entire day!!!
Gary:  Good Morning. Ok, first off, I am NOT perpetually late. In fact, I am never late. I arrive precisely when I intend to (LOL) but today I decide to get up early, get ready, have some coffee and I haven’t heard anything from Hope yet, so I text her at 8:11 and ask her if she is ready. It was a reasonable question, or so I thought. Her reply said, “Ready to take a nap. Its way crappy looking here, no sun whatsoever.” Damn…another weather report. I have been outside and I know it looks like that, but so what? You would think we would be use to it by now since every damn weekend has been this way! She calls and we decide to go for it as usual but tells me, “Don’t rush, don’t leave yet, give me an hour and if you come early I am not letting you in the door!” So, I take that literally and don’t leave my house until 9:17, since I don’t really want to wait outside her door like some delivery boy while she gets ready. It was a bit surprising that she asked me to take my time so I asked her if she knew who she was talking to. She stated, “Oh yea, I must have bumped my head.”
Hope:    At about 9:20 a.m., I remembered that I was supposed to tell Gary to expect delays on the 126 for a bike (bicycle) race of some kind, but completely forgot to do so. Oh Well. It’s now 9:37 and coincidentally, Gary just sent me a text informing me he was just leaving. Yea, like I believe that!! He’s probably stuck in Piru watching men and women in bright colored spandex peddling away!! The weather is w-a-y crappy looking…no blue skies to speak of, low 60s and a forecast of only 73 and cloudy . The entire sky was gray and gloomy. Now, there’s the possibility that the weather is different in Northridge, so I try to let Gary know what it’s like north of the Valley. He assures me the sun will begin to emerge around noon, but I’m doubtful.  Nevertheless, I’m all suited up and ready to ride…..and EAT!!
Gary:     Sunday morning was a tough one for me since I was out until 2 am on Saturday listening to my kid’s band and then up early for a Union meeting. And it didn’t end there, as I also had to get to help a brother pick up a new bike at Glendale Harley, attended an event at Barger Harley, and then had dinner with a friend that night. By the time Sunday came around, I was totally exhausted but ready to leave on-time Sunday morning. It was Hope’s decision to tell me to take my time, though I don’t think that will happen again.
Hope:    It’s now 10:05, so I guess Gary’s text wasn’t a joke. When I said don’t show up before 9:30, I meant it, but an hour later? What the fuck? I think my stomach lining is eating itself….                At about 10:15, Gary pulls up and explains his logic behind not leaving his house until 9:30… yea o.k., whatever… so we pull out of Fillmore and head to civilization…
Gary:     When I arrive, she calls me an ‘asshole’ for being late! What??? You told me to take my time, don’t rush, all that and now I am an asshole for being late! Of course, I misunderstood (yea, right) and she meant not to get to her house before 9:30, so I didn’t. LOL. Anyway, we get on the road and head to a place called ‘The Halfway House Cafe’. Hope will tell you about our ride to what she refers to as ‘civilization’.
Hope:    I have eaten at the Halfway House Café many times and loved it. It’s a quaint and cozy little place on the side of Sierra Highway with nothing around. In the past, the staff has always been attentive and the food consistently good, with quite a nice selection for another hole-in-the-wall place. Different than most other restaurants we have written about, this one was east of me, meaning a 20-mile ride down the 126 and hopping over to Sierra Highway by way of Bouquet Canyon and Valencia Boulevard, which turns into Soledad Canyon. After a quick left onto Sierra, the Halfway House Café is only a few minutes down the road. Unfortunately, we have to enter civilization to get there which means cars, traffic lights, asshole drivers, lots of concrete, etc. The good part is, once you live through all that, Sierra Highway takes you from ‘civilization’ to the beginning of horse property and large ranches and is quite beautiful.
We arrive about 45 minutes later and apparently became invisible during the ride. After taking our seats at the counter, we observe every waitress walking past us unnoticed several times, so I politely ask for a tea, a coffee, and some menus. Not a good start! It’s a simple breakfast menu…eggs, meat, potatoes (country style or hash browns), pancakes, etc. But they also offer linguica, a slightly-spicy Portuguese sausage, prime rib, T-bone steak, pork chops, etc. We finally order, me deciding on an omelet of linguica, onions, Ortega chile, and avocado with country style potatoes, with an English muffin and a side of country gravy.
Hope:    According to their coffee cups, the place has been around since 1931, but there is no historical information offered at the restaurant. Their website indicates that in the 1920’s, the place started out as a trading post and named appropriately so, as it was half way between Los Angeles and Palmdale, and became a restaurant years later. Sadly, the décor doesn’t offer any photos of ‘remember when’ or of the lay of the land back in the day. Instead, it has lots of posted signs saying things like, “I am Woman, I am Invincible, I am Tired,” Beer is part of the Food Group, but Food is not part of the Beer Group,“ and “Getting teenagers to listen to you is like trying to nail jello to a tree” and crap like that. The plates are of the plastic variety, they don’t believe in turning on the heat lamp to keep food warm until picked up by the waitress(es), and if you peek at the right time, you can catch one of the cooks eating while in the kitchen cooking your breakfast. 
Gary:     I ordered the linquicia sausage with over easy eggs with country potatoes, a side of biscuits and gravy and coffee. First off, Hope tastes her side of gravy and notices it is cold. Cold, not even warm but cold. Not a good beginning. We inform the waitress of this and she got us a new order each. Well, to tell you the truth it was not worth it. The biscuits were like bad pancakes and the gravy, well, was just OK. The one thing that was good though was the sausage. I had never tried this type, it was Hope’s recommendation, and I have to say it is tasty. It was a little spicy but very meaty. I liked it. The eggs were cooked properly but nothing was hot. The food was just warm and then Hope noticed the warmer on the food counter was not on. So it was just sitting there waiting for the waitress to pick it up getting cold. Very odd. The coffee tasted like they hadn’t cleaned the pots in a while. You know the taste that happens when you don’t clean the pots often. It gets a metallic flavor to it. Blahhh…. Although I am such a coffee addict that I still had 3 cups. Yes, I know what you must think, he is not quite right. Soooo, your point??? LOL
Hope:    The food arrived after what seemed like an eternity and went downhill from there. My omelet was certainly not the ‘fluffy’ variety offered by the menu, had no avocado and the country gravy was cold; not lukewarm, but COLD. Truth be told, it wasn’t so great to start with and it’s MUCH worse cold. The potatoes were so-so. We finished up and unlike being out in the Ventura area where we have a pattern of walking around downtown and planting ourselves at Palermo’s Coffee House, we’re out of our surroundings and aren’t quite sure where to go. We cruise down Davenport Road for awhile and then back to Newhall Ranch Road and the 126. On the ride home, the sun made a bit of a debut, but it remained rather chilly and if I didn’t know better, would swear it was going to rain.  We split off in Fillmore with Gary heading to Simi Valley Harley to hang out with his club brothers and I rode out to catch the tail end of the Strawberry Festival in Oxnard.
Gary:     All in all it was just an OK day. The weather never really warmed up, the food was just OK and riding though ‘civilization’ was just like everything else. OK, so we learned our lesson, we were just trying to give you enthusiasts, Sunday riders, a closer place to go without venturing out too far into the wilderness. Don’t get used to it, as I think Hope will agree, we are done with the urban ‘Breakfast for Bikers’ experiment…lol… The service here is just OK. It is another one of those O.K. Café’s. In fact we decided to start a new rating system. ‘Off the charts’, ‘OK Café’, and ‘Don’t bother’.
Halfway House Café                                                                                       15564 Sierra Highway                                                                                 Canyon Country, CA                                                                         661.251.0102


 




Monday, May 16, 2011

DW's Country Cafe

Hope:    Today was indeed a day of surprises…
As I started to check the weather forecast for the day, it seemed that every time I did so, there was a 2-degree loss and an increase of the chance of rain. Shit! Regardless, we decided to defy the odds and ride. Surprise #1-Gary was on time! No kidding, huh? In fact, he was actually 2 minutes early!! In fact, he did me a big favor and changed my spark plugs while I was locking up the house (never use cheap spark plugs). While throwing my stuff in my saddlebags, he told me a funny story about a friend who seems to think that putting your bike on a Dyno(meter) has something to do with breaking in a new/rebuilt engine. How lame is that?!?!
Gary:     I actually woke up this morning about 6:30AM and when I walked outside to get the paper, it was raining. I could not believe it. The previous evening, I got caught in drizzle as I was riding back from a club event in Banner (yes, I rode 400 miles after being up till 2AM Friday night, watching my kid’s band perform in Hollywood. See--I am a tough old biker… LOL!), so I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised. I got back inside, made some coffee, and said ‘fuck it’ and got in the shower and got ready to go. In the meantime, Hope called and was wondering about the weather. By the time I was done getting ready, the sun was shining in the Valley as she was informing about the cloud mass in Fillmore, thinking it was going to rain again. But as we have done before, we decided to defy the odds and ride anyway. (She is as tough as any dude I have ridden with and rides better than most of them; especially the guy that thinks a dyno-tune breaks in a bike…lol.)  I got on my bike at 8:40 and was in Fillmore at 9:28AM... Surprise, surprise…on time and ready to go.
Hope:    Not wanting to venture too far from Heritage Valley in case the skies opened up, we headed down Telegraph Road through Santa Paula and into Ventura. The beautiful 2-lane road brought the amazing smells of lemons and strawberries, and picturesque views of the mountains, miles of orchards, and a flower farm. We took a left onto Victoria Boulevard and hung close to the right lane, not wanting to miss the quick right-turn into DW’s County Café. There was plenty of parking available and upon entering the restaurant, lots of empty booths (they don’t offer a counter).
Gary:     Even though we have ridden this road many times before, I never tire of it and because their early-morning rain made the air especially crisp and clean. With the crops being wet, it brought out some of the most incredible aromas you can imagine. Hope actually slowed down (surprise) so we both could enjoy the scent of the strawberries.  You know it must have been great for her to slow down. With the clouds in the very blue sky, with all the flowers just going crazy and the lemons, well, just close your eyes right now and picture it. Beautiful, right? You have to take this ride people! DW’s Country Cafe is another place Hope has found. I am amazed (surprised) at her ability to keep coming up with these places.
Hope:    The menu was filled with usual breakfast foods-eggs, bacon, sausage, French toast, pancakes, etc., but also featured original skillet breakfasts, machaca and eggs, chicken-fried steak, and rib-eye and eggs…Surprise #2. I had a really hard time choosing just one, so I chose the ‘Nine Juan Juan’-a wonderful combination of grilled potatoes, onions, peppers, Ortega chiles, chorizo, scrambled eggs and cheese, served with a side of tortillas, corn or flour.
Our waiter, Joseph, was great. I asked him to rate the country gravy and he offered to bring us some..which turned out to be a half-order of biscuits and gravy. It was a perfect way to start the morning meal and stopped our stomach from rumbling. After gobbling it down, both of us decided it was very, very good and Joseph informed us it was on the house…Surprise #3!
Gary:     We both had a hard time ordering and spent some time drinking our coffee and tea (along with digging into the biscuits and gravy appetizer) before making a decision. I ordered the Rincon Hash and Eggs which is a combination of ham, bacon, onions, green peppers and sausage, mixed with grilled potatoes and served with over-easy eggs on top. The eggs were cooked perfectly, and the rest was, well, just great. It was all very tasty and fresh. I ordered raisin toast but they were out of it and Joseph recommended cinnamon toast. Cool with me and a great choice, the toast was very good. This was a pleasant surprise because not many cafes offer this kind of variety of toast. There menu is vast as Hope has stated with many of our favorite breakfast foods. Again, and I can’t say this enough, this is another one of those places with personality and to us, it is just as important as the food. This place delivers.
Hope:    As our meals were served and we dug in, the restaurant started to fill up f-a-s-t. The service was wonderful—we were attended to by three different waiters and one waitress at different times. They were cheerful, attentive, and very friendly.
After an hour and a half, with our bellies full and still no appearance of raindrops, we headed to Ventura to hang at our regular stop at Palermo’s Coffee House for some sorbetto and people-watching.  After a few more hours, we decided to hit the road, stopping on the way home to photograph a local flower farm.
Gary:     We also visited the Ventura Museum which to my surprise is quite nice with some amazing art work. The sculptured dolls show the history of the Czars of Russia and makes for an amazing exhibit. There is also mosaic tile art in the courtyard that you have to check out. And let’s face it--we needed to walk around to make room for the sorbetto. LOL
Hope:    As we made our way back into Fillmore, the temperatures were dropping, but we still hadn’t encountered any rain…Surprise #4. 
I would highly recommend DW’s Country Café with a ‘9’! Bring your appetites and enjoy!!


1985 S Victoria Ave
Ventura, CA 93003
(805) 642-9841
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Monday, May 9, 2011

J & M Cafe

Gary:   Man, I got up this morning to the sound of my cell phone text messaging beep going off starting at 7:10AM. I am like, “Who the hell is up this early that needs to talk to me?” So for about an hour I tried to ignore it, but to no avail. Finally I had to see who this was... Guess who? You’re right, it was my darling partner-in-crime, Miss Hope, who was up and raring to go and you know what the text message was? The frigging weather report and she is telling me how shitty it was going to be for the ride today. So as I am starting to get ready to actually be there on time Hope reminds me (another text and she used to hate texts) that it is Mother's Day and to call my mom. So instead of procrastinating, I just made the call, wished my 83-year old mother a Happy Mothers Day and then started to get ready. I did text Hope back letting her know that I would be delayed due to the amount of communications I had to do this morning and her reply was ‘yes dear’. Now our way of saying that to each other is far from endearing. It is actually our way of being sarcastic to one another. It’s like ‘whatever’... Anyway, with that out of the way I finally made it to the garage. The weather report was correct though and it was again, overcast and drizzling. Hope calls it a conspiracy..

Hope:   After a trip out of town and an incredibly busy week, I was soooo ready to get out on the bike. The temperatures this week were on the warm side, and what should have continued into the week took a nose dive and lost 20 degrees somewhere in the transition. Crap! Again with the damn weather conspiracy!! Gary went on to tell me about how in the 60s, there was actually talk that the Russians were controlling our weather patterns. Of course, that makes no sense whatsoever, since Russia has MUCH worse weather than ours. You would think that if they could pull off a stunt like weather control, they would start in their own country and turn Siberia into a summer resort! Or maybe Gary consumed too much of that Russian vodka back in the day…lol…

Surprisingly, the one who would have forgot to call and wish his mother a Happy Mother’s Day arrived on time. And for the record, “yes dear” is just another way of saying, “fuck you!”

Gary:   When I arrived in Fillmore, Hope was already out the door but amazed that I was on time. Her bike being ready, we take off. Now, I just rode 45 minutes to get there and didn’t even get a chance to pee and I needed gas so we didn’t get too far that one part of me is about to overflow and the other part is about to run out; strange dilemma.  Hope had already had some places picked out and as usual I just let it go. The funny part is she changed her own mind. I will let her tell you about the ride there and what changed her mind...

Hope:   Nonetheless, we decided to ‘pick a place’ and headed out to enjoy the day. My first thought was to check out the Cajun Kitchen Café, but after riding a few miles down the 126 in what turned out to be a sunny day in the mid 60s, Gary decided he had to stop in Saticoy. It was at that point that we decided to head all the way to Oak View to the J & M Café. Unfortunately, we were both already hungry, so we had to fight the urge to stop at Allison’s Café for a cinnamon roll and coffee. We headed to Ventura by way of Foothill Boulevard, took a quick left at Seward, a right on Main Street, and another right into the Boulevard and followed that into Oak View.

Gary:   This restaurant is a pretty discrete joint. If you didn’t pay attention you would drive right past it. I would anyway because I never know where the hell I am going. We walk in and we sat at our favorite spot, the counter. Here we are always able to get a good vantage point of the action in the place. The service was not exactly what I would say exceptional but there were only a couple of waitresses working so they were pretty busy. Once we got our coffee/tea, we settled down a bit.

Hope:   Gary tells no lies…this is a non-descript place and if you didn’t know it was there, you’d miss it. We walked in and although there were a few people waiting to be seated, the counter offered 2 empty seats begging to be occupied. Despite the place appearing pretty full with customers, I could only count 3 people working in the dining room, so it looked like they were a bit short-staffed. And this was Mother’s Day!! We also appeared to be invisible, as there was no one to greet us, ask us if we wanted coffee, or provide us with place settings or menus.

We finally let the waitress know we’d like one coffee and one tea and while studying the menu, I picked up part of Friday’s local newspaper and low and behold, Sharon, our waitress at the Vagabond Coffee Shop is featured on the front page in an article about raising the retirement age.  It seems that many of the Vagabond’s waitresses are well, seasoned. Sharon is 68 years young, Yvonne is 71, and there’s another who will be 85 in September! But I digress…

With coffee and tea served, I headed to the closest booth to grab some silverware. The waitress returned after a little while and with my stomach rumbling, I ordered the chicken-fried steak with scrambled eggs, and homefries. And again the waiting continues…

Breakfast was served about 15 minutes later and well, it was o.k. The service improved somewhat but overall, everything was just o.k. In fact, I’d call this place the O.K. Café.  The chicken-fried steak was formed into a perfect patty and probably previously (store-bought) frozen, the scrambled eggs were not fluffy, but rather flat and well done; the homefries were good but nothing to write home about.  Let’s face it—one cannot live on homefries alone!

Gary:   My food was OK. I ordered pork chops and eggs (over easy of course), with sourdough toast and home fried potatoes. The eggs were cooked exactly right, the pork chops were good but a little dry which can make them tough and the potatoes were OK. The coffee was OK as was the service, the look of the place, the parking and the jam which was of the packaged sort. So, to tell you the truth, it is hard to write anything bad or good. It was just OK. Would I go back again? Yes, because it wasn’t bad. But with so many other great places around I would have to have a really good reason. I will let Hope tell you about dessert.

Hope:   Truth be told, the ride was the better part of the morning and luckily, we still had to get back home.  And since we were already talking about Sharon and the Vagabond Coffee House, we decided to head there for some homemade berry cobbler for dessert. How sick is that????????????????? And to make matters worse, after we finished the berry cobbler, Gary decided to order a double-order of their apple cobbler. Now THAT’S sick, doncha’ think??

J & M Café (The O.K. Café)
490 Ventura Avenue
Oak View, CA 93022-9615
(805) 649-4712